Got Kinky Sex?

Here’s some video of this hot lesbian couple I met last weekend at How Weird St. fair, then we partied with her float at Bay to Breakers today…its called the Porta Party.

Today it is smokin’ hot out here in SF with hot naked women and freaks and lots of PINK at the Bay to Breakers. Lots of swine, bacon, pirates, ships, and of course tons of grinding asses. Best sound system had live emcees at panhandle!

Reading the recently published 2nd edition of The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures, I came upon the most succinct summary of why being kinky is so important to me:

Knowing Yourself.

…inaccurate but deeply held beliefs about sex and gender can drive our behavior unconsciously. They are the roots of sexism and sex-negativism, and to be a radical slut you are going to have to uproot them. To truly know yourself is to live on a constant journey of self-exploration…it is the way you become free to choose how you want to live and live, own your life, and become truly the author of your experience. (p. 68)

For myself, the ecstasy of hot wild sex with lots of people is a great motivator to do the work of knowing myself. I find that others into polyamory and the kink lifestyle are more self-aware and make better lovers than those who aren’t, in general. I am proud to be in a community of mentors who teach the skills of being a self-aware player.

Think of a time when you felt uncomfortable about a lover’s request to do something sexual that you didn’t understand. How often was your reaction based on assumptions about that act or person, rather than how you truly felt inside about the opportunity?

Exploring adult movies and sites that feature kinky sex, bondage sex, lesbian sex, or anything that might be currently taboo sex for you, is one way to get over unconscious behaviors that might be interfering with your or your partner’s sexual self-realization. (more…)